No mas

No more chemo, ever, hopefully. I received my last dose of this process earlier this morning. 

It was exciting and shitty all at the same time. Exciting because of the obvious--I

Might actually be done with willingly injecting poison into my body.

Shitty because I had to chew/suck on ice cubes the entire time because this particular drug can cause immediate viscous mouth sores.

I seem to have dodged the biggest bullets, with only a few small sores noticeable. 

It's all taken with a grain of salt. The team here is surprised that my counts have been so "reluctant" to fall. They frame

It as a compliment--"you're very resilient!" This contributes to me feeling "okay" so far. Calling it "okay" is setting a low bar but, given how it could be, I'll take it.   

However, fall the counts shall, dramatically. Of that I am assured. When it happens, they seem to think they have enough drugs to keep me "relatively comfortable." We'll see what that means.

Still, today is a good day. 

No more chemo. No mas. 

That can never be a bad thing. 

Stem Cells go back in tomorrow. They call it my "rebirth," or "my new birthday." I don't know about that. 

I just want it to work. 

Then I want to get the hell out of here. 

T-14 days, starting tomorrow.

In the meantime, though--I've had visitors. A brother who has two young kids took the time to come from Grand Rapids to watch the Lions embarrass themselves with me.

We like watching the tigers suck too.

My dad, who is THE MAN, has been back and forth a number of times. He's one of a kind. 

So is Emma, who, because she cares about me, slept next to me like this last night:

Upright in a lazy boy. Interrupted by nurses/techs coming in every hour, tossing and turning, a blanket over her head to block the fluorescents...and this is a girl who is serious about her shut eye. She's better to me than I could ask for, which makes her the keeper that she is. I'm twitterpated. Smitten. In love. Schmoopie.

My phone rings constantly with good friends checking in on me. Making me laugh (even if it hurts). To commiserate on how unfathomably bad the Lions were, and to celebrate the school we love being #2 in the nation (NUMBER TWO IN THE NATION AHHHHH WHATS HAPPENING?!?!)

Point is, in a place where isolation is essentially the idea, I've felt anything but. That's because of you guys. 

Happy fake birthday to me tomorrow.