Throwback notion. Also, America.

"Happiness consists in realizing it is all a great strange dream."

-Jack Kerouac

A while back, I wrote about a feeling I had: that I needed to "embrace" this situation and take it as it came, to learn from it. That even in the tougher moments, when it may be hardest to realize it, I'm fortunate and I'm experiencing something relatively few get to (have to). It was probably a pie in the sky notion. The kind of optimism that screams of a defense mechanism. 

Still, I think it's worthwhile. 

I've gotten away from that lately, I think. Lost it in the fog of frustration and anger and uncertainty. 

One way or another, this is happening. I have no control over basically everything that will occur and no control over the outcomes. What will happen will happen. 

I can control the choice to embrace the moments. Experience things. Resist the urge to turn on the auto-pilot, the apathy cruise control, and take it all in. 

It's probably a pie in the sky notion, but I think I'll give it a try again. I'm still angry, but anger only can carry you so far. 

I have a better family than I deserve. A beautiful, kind, patient girlfriend. Great friends. A great job. 

Time is limited for us all, cancer or not. Certainly not preaching--not at all. Just trying to remind myself not to waste any of this finite commodity. 

Happy 4th Y'all. 

America.