#FreeAdvice Avoid this surgery if at all possible. And the best way to learn you have cancer is with a butt pill

Median Sternotomy to excise a mediastinal mass roughly the size of a softball. 

The lead up to surgery was no fun. The recovery was no fun. The anal suppository was no fun. The post surgical pathology report was no fun. 

So what I'm saying is it wasn't much fun. But I have a scar?

Hey, Doctors delivering bad news to a scared patient, here's a piece of advice. 

(This actually happened)

Seconds after explaining to me that I did, in fact, have cancer, he went on explaining what it was and so on and doing his best to make sure I understood what was happening. I didn't hear much of that, my ears were ringing after I heard I had cancer. Next thing I did happen to hear out of his mouth was "we need you to take this anal suppository right now."

So in short, the conversation went:

"Hi, you have cancer. Stick this in your ass. Good luck."

So my advice to doctors is to DO THIS EVERY TIME. I was more confused in that moment than sad, and ever since then, it's made me laugh.

Cancer diagnoses and Anal suppositories need to go hand in hand.