Scars, locker room etiquette, and automatic inclusion into groups you aren't sure you want into.

So there's the "Jeep Wave," the strange community wave that everyone who drives a Jeep shares. It says "Hello! I also like to drive a car without doors," while passing each other on the highway without actually needing to speak.  

It's interesting, and whatever, it's cool. Anything that brings a sense of community that isn't harming anyone, go for it. 

As I'm easing back into going to the gym, however, I'm learning that a certain new characteristic about myself has bought me entry into a group I'm not sure I want a part of. 

These guys:

port

yuck

Zipper Chest

Earned me one free ticket to the "let's be old and naked and talk about and touch each other's scars at the gym" club.

It started with a few puzzled looks . Faces that said "who's this newcomer and why the hell is he so young?"

This progressed into a few smiling nods, then pointing to their own scars.

And quickly escalated into "Hey, so what's the story here, tell me all about it."

Me: "Well, um, I had surgery to remove a ma..."
Guy: "OH YEAH GOT A QUAD BYPASS MYSELF, BACK IN '99."


I understand that people look at each other in a locker room. I've spent a lot of time in them, it's just the way it is.

Still, when an older gentleman comes up to you and starts touching the scar, commenting on how "much nicer they are these days, not rugged like mine," it's a little much for me.

It's not always creepy. The guys are usually genuinely interested, and have advice and stories of their own. Doctors to recommend, doctors to avoid. They're all very educated on the names of the procedures, the pitfalls and benefits of each one, and they marvel at "modern medicine" and how lucky I am to have had it done in this "day and age." They applaud me being at the gym and wish me a "safe workout."

They're a funny bunch, and as much as it weirds me out, I appreciate them.

 They all seem slightly disappointed when they learn my scar wasn't for a heart surgery. "Oh," they say. A few have wondered aloud why on earth anyone would get a tattoo (I have one).

Sorry to disappoint, fellas. Does this mean I can leave the group?

No?

Well, can you guys at least put some clothes on before we start?

Thanks.